Pulling a Yanni

Story Sent in by Nicholas:

I talked a lot about music with Rosemary before our first date and when we finally met we exchanged mix CDs. I gave her an eclectic mix of mostly classic rock and a couple of show tunes I liked. She handed me a Yanni CD. Not a mix CD. As in a literal used Yanni CD. And it was scratched beyond reason - as if someone had listened to it so much that it was worn down to the label.

I wanted to appear gracious so I said, "You must really love Yanni."

She then reached into her purse and pulled out two identical CDs - each the same Yanni album as the first one, each similarly damaged. In fact, one had a crack. She handed them both to me.

I didn't have anything to say. So she filled the silence, "I just really want to share my love of Yanni with you." Then her eyes lit up. She clearly had an idea. "After dinner, you have to let me play some Yanni for you."

I joked, "You have a piano with you?"

"Better," she replied.

After dinner she brought me to her car, popped her trunk, and pulled out a clarinet. Right there on the street, she played note after screechy note, each worse than the one before it. If Yanni could've heard her, he'd have personally stuffed her into her own clarinet case and thrown it into a lake. Regardless, I told her that she did a fine job and we parted with hugs.

The next day she called me up to ask if I had listened to the CDs she had given me. I told her that they were really scratched and that they didn't play in my machine (truthfully, I hadn't even tried).

She said, "Oh... I have to go," and hung up on me. I never heard from her again.