Story Sent in by Kate:
Steve was a graphic artist who told me that he'd draw a picture of me, based on one of my dating profile photos, and give it to me on our first date. I was touched and I thought it was really a sweet, unexpected gesture.
Our first date was at an Italian restaurant and we sat down together. He wasted no time in breaking out the drawing, which he had tightly rolled up and tied with a blue ribbon. I thanked him and opened it up.
It was worse than the picture Napoleon Dynamite drew of Trisha. And that was just my face. He had drawn a full-body sketch of me, and he had drawn me nude. My thighs were enormous and he had drawn me such a hairy crotch that it looked like I was riding a baby woolly mammoth.
Before I could say anything he said, "I drew you that way because you love nature and that's how I saw you."
Thanks... I think. I pretended gratitude and he seemed to believe it but I couldn't wait to be out of there. We didn't go out again but I did wind up trading the drawing away at a subsequent gift exchange. Wherever it is now, I hope its owner is happier with it than I was.
Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. Everyone knows that, gosh!
ReplyDeleteHe should have drawn her a liger instead. It's pretty much my favorite animal
DeleteBecause that always goes well.
DeleteInteresting gift exchange that must have been:
ReplyDelete-- "here's a nude drawing of me"
-- "oh, I got you a collection of imported pastas and sauces"
-- "that's great! thanks so much I love pasta"
-- "I love masturbating to weird bad drawings so we both win"
The most fascinating thing about this story is that gift exchange.
DeleteThe best part of this is the OP giving the drawing away. OP, was the drawing labeled with your name?
ReplyDeleteMaybe need to hook this guy up with ass-face girl?
ReplyDelete