6/28/2017

A Few Inches Too Many

Story Sent in by Peter:

Sara insisted that we go to a Target for our first date. I wasn't sure why that seemed appropriate to her but I soon found out why. She took me to the electronics section, told me she needed a new TV, then cuddled up close and told me that she'd invite me over all the time and we could have "all kinds of fun" if I bought her a new 60".

I asked her if she'd settle for dinner. After some negotiation, she saw things my way. I took her out to an Italian place in a next-door strip mall, she moped the entire time, begged me to return to Target with her, and when I refused, she said, "I'll just find some other guy to bring home with me, then."

That was our only date.
Posted by at
Labels: ,

9 comments:

  1. Unknown6/28/2017 3:22 AM

    Students, students, please take a seat and quiet down.
    Professor Steve is now going to guest-lecture about the TV Wh0re and how she relates to the Dinner Wh0re.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Architect6/28/2017 7:11 AM

      *settles into chair attentively*
      Oh yeah, this is going to be good.

      Delete
    2. punkpoodle226/28/2017 7:47 AM

      Best Reply Ever.

      Delete
    3. Steve6/28/2017 8:30 AM

      Actually, I fear this woman has tested as a false-positive for TV Wh0redness. In reality, she's most likely just a straight up prostitute...

      Delete
  2. The Architect6/28/2017 7:13 AM

    Please OP, please tell me you didn't pay for dinner.

    You know, this girl is absolutely going to find someone to buy her a 60" TV.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Steve6/28/2017 8:32 AM

      Can I get some nookie if I trash-pick her an old obsolete 60" Hitachi projection TV?!

      Delete
  3. Unknown6/28/2017 9:47 AM

    Dinner whores are getting awfully ambitious!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Architect6/28/2017 10:10 AM

      Hey, those curved 60" TVs aren't going to buy themselves.

      Or maybe, much like Darwin, we are witnessing an evolution of the Dinner Wh0re into something much more terrifying.

      Delete
  4. Tourist of Life6/29/2017 12:56 AM

    Should have taken her to Rent-A-Center. Is it OK if I pay weekly?

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.