1/04/2017

But the Next Day's Samples Tasted Like Him

Story Sent in by Helene:

Erik took me to a mall food court for our first date. Not as romantic as I'd hoped but maybe he had a great personality.

He didn't. He cycled around for free samples a few times then sat down at a table, set the samples on a napkin, and said, "Here you go," indicating that I should enjoy all of the free samples he had just collected. Most of them were types of chicken.

"I'm vegetarian," I reminded him.

He then gave me a sour look, ate them all himself, then said, "I'll be right back with something vegetarian for you."

He never returned.
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18 comments:

  1. MelSleeps1/04/2017 5:19 AM

    Ok,this title had me at"samples and"him".I thought it might be a dirty story but no,it was not.Just me and my dirty mind.Darn it,I was all ready to tell my free sample joke.Anyway...I like free samples.I have never heard of getting free samples of food on a date however.This is beyond frugal.This is beyond cheap.You never go full frugal on a first date.At least he could of taken Op to a salad bar and handed her some salad underneath the table.But what get's me is that if you're going to go full frugal and are looking for free eats,take your date to Costco's.Whenever I go shopping there I indulge in the free samples and that is my brunch.They also have a fine selection of vegan food samples so there is every type of food for the penny pinching palate.
    Op should not have waited.In fact OP should of headed right for the nearest salad bar.At first sings of"wtf" end the date.It should of been op that sampled victory.I always hate it when the bad date does the ditching.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown1/04/2017 7:54 AM

    I would have said, "wow you're as cheap as this grade D chicken," dropped the mike, and walked out with my dignity to a chorus of "OOOOOHHH" from fellow mall goers. *sigh* one day, bananas. One day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ladydyani1/04/2017 8:29 AM

      RDJ thinks that would be awesome.

      Delete
    2. MelSleeps1/04/2017 1:22 PM

      Bravo!

      Delete
    3. The Architect1/04/2017 4:22 PM

      Someone would have had to administer first-aid to that poor bastard because that would be a sick burn.

      Delete
  3. Steve1/04/2017 8:45 AM

    I, for one, applaud Erik's resourcefulness. He clearly has worked out his own effective method for dealing with dinner wh0res. While OP MIGHT have passed the dinner wh0re test (we'll never know), she failed the vegetarian test, as NO ONE wants to date a vegetarian, unless she's supermodel hot. Chicken wings > average-looking chicks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown1/04/2017 9:43 AM

      This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    2. Steve1/04/2017 9:44 AM

      Is THAT why I don't get haters anymore?!

      Delete
    3. Unknown1/04/2017 9:45 AM

      wow, troll game is on point today, Steve. Too bad there aren't anonymous comments anymore that really would have opened up another shit storm about vegans and vegetarians hahaha

      Delete
    4. Unknown1/04/2017 9:45 AM

      I'm pretty sure that's exactly why

      Delete
    5. Steve1/04/2017 9:46 AM

      Aww, Bananas, you KNOW I'd give up chicken wings for you... er, at least the ginger garlic variety... I mean, what IS that? That's not a real wing flavor...

      Delete
    6. Unknown1/04/2017 10:09 AM

      I agree. That's just something Trump made up a decade ago that went way out of hand too quickly and now too many people want it so he can't take it back. he knows it was a shit idea in the first place, but by now he's stuck with it and has to have his ginger garlic wings and eat them, too.

      Delete
    7. Unknown1/04/2017 10:09 AM

      oh no wait. that's his presidency. my bad

      Delete
    8. The Architect1/04/2017 4:24 PM

      You, my dear Banana, are on fire!

      Delete
    9. MelSleeps1/04/2017 5:46 PM

      On fire like bananas foster!I declare this national Bananas Foster Day in honor of Briana!

      Delete
  4. Exiled Stardust1/06/2017 2:43 PM

    Any male who calls women "dinner whores" needs to stop dating and get himself a Real Doll, because he hates real women too much to be trusted alone with them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Unknown1/06/2017 5:05 PM

      hey one of the anonymous commenter got an account! I for one support your decision to come out, and I just hope your parents feel the same :*

      Delete

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