12/25/2016

Elf Help

Profile Sent in by Elizabeth:

What I'm doing with my life:

I am an elf who works for the Santa. Not like that guy in that movie (Will Farrel - a FAKE elf). I seriously work in a toy factory so I'm about as close to a real elf as you will ever get. I can't promise to fulfil your every wish but I can come close because I do not have any debt. It is not a factory of elves. I am one and only specific one of a kind kind of man but the Santa........ the Santa is my boss (he is not real Santa, the is the FAKE Santa) and he is a class a magnificent 100% specimen of alabama black snake. Shorter than me. No Santa is shorter than an actual elf but he is not an actual Santa and I am not an actual elf. What are you doing for the holidays?
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8 comments:

  1. Unknown12/25/2016 11:58 AM

    I am a commenter, not like that Steve guy (a FAKE commenter). I work for the Mistah Jay, who is probably taller than me. Many people are. Mistah Jay is a 100% specimen of sexy blogger.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. JMG12/25/2016 9:53 PM

      I'm 5'8", making me just barely taller than your average Alabama black snake.

      Delete
  2. nomatophobia12/25/2016 1:26 PM

    How did I know "Alabama Black Snake" would be an urban dictionary entry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Architect12/27/2016 8:29 AM

      I could have guessed, but damnit, I looked instead. Come on Archie, get it together! You're better than this!

      Delete
  3. Ben Lapointe12/26/2016 1:39 PM

    What is an Alabama Black Snake?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Knittychick12/27/2016 1:00 AM

    Oddly impressed with the mix of Santa and Full Metal Jacket refrences.

    ReplyDelete
  5. The Architect12/27/2016 8:30 AM

    "What are you doing for the holidays?"

    Locking all my doors and windows.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ladydyani12/27/2016 9:14 AM

    After reading this site I can't help but think that everyone emailing on dating sites is constantly drunk and/or high.

    ReplyDelete

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