So Breitbart's Hiring?

Story Sent in by Eileen:

When I met up with Damon in person after he found me online, he asked me if I'd be up for a quick dinner. When I asked him why it needed to be quick he said that he had a surprise for me afterward.

He had a laptop bag with him and he took me to a really cheap, rundown diner for some gross food. My burger looked more like a meat puddle than a burger.

As for his surprise, he then brought me to a Kinko's and opened up his bag. He pulled out several sheets of paper with charts and reports on them. He said, "I'm copying off 600 of these. I need you to staple them."

That was his surprise. Me helping him staple. Before I could say no, he said, "I did just pay for dinner so maybe you can help for just a little while? We can quit after a bit. I just need to get most of these done."

I asked him, "Don't the copiers have an auto-staple function?"

He laughed. "Yeah, but it always does it wrong. I need the human touch."

He started making copies. I was able to glance at his report-things and they were utter nonsense. There was a paragraph about the environment then a paragraph about Obama then a paragraph about the L.A. Dodgers then a paragraph about fire safety. And his charts and graphs were even worse. They plotted things like the usage of cornmeal alongside how close Mars was to Earth during its orbit.

After about 15 minutes of helping, I became really bored and asked him if we could finish up soon.

"Finish up? We just started! We have hundreds to go!"

I said, "Then I'll probably go soon. I'm sorry. I didn't want to copy, tonight."

He said, "I'll tell my boss you didn't help. But fine. Whatever."

His boss, whoever it was, wasn't my boss. If that was all Damon had to threaten me with then I felt it was worth the risk. I left.

He wrote me an email that night to tell me that he had phoned his boss and that said boss wasn't at all pleased with me.