Try Walking Her Towards a Lake?

Story Sent in by Kevin:

I noticed something weird when I was out with Mary. It was a warm day and we took a nice, long walk around a park. But whenever I tried to walk aside her, she'd speed up until she was about a step or two ahead of me. And she did it quickly, like it was an intentional walking pattern correction.

I decided to ask about it as a joke: "Do I smell?"

She said, "I don't want people to think we're a couple."

"But we can be two friends, right?"

She said, "I never walk right next to my friends."

"Why not?"

She said, "Because I don't want people to think that I'm in a couple with my friends."

"I don't think people think that."

"Then you don't know people too well. You don't walk next to someone unless they're your significant other."

I had never heard of such a rule, and I thought it was silly, so I caught up with her to walk next to her.

She sped up. I caught up again.

"Stop it," she said and she hurried ahead.

I caught up again. She yelled, "Stop!" and ran ahead way further.

I laughed, then asked her if she ate at separate tables while out to dinner with friends. You know, just in case someone thought that two people sitting at the same table over a meal absolutely had to be dating.

"Don't be stupid," she said.

I resolved to be less stupid in the future and to never go out with her again.