Story Sent in by Tammy:
Kenneth picked me up at my house for our first date. He asked if he could use my bathroom before we left. I guided him to a restroom near my living room and I waited for him on my couch.
He took a little while and I began to be slightly concerned when I heard him moaning from the other side of the bathroom door.
At first I thought he was in pain, but then I realized with a start that he was pleasuring himself.
"Aww... god... yessss... yeaaaaaaah... oh man, ohhh yessss... oh! Oh! Yeah! Oh!"
It was loud enough to hear across the living room. I debated whether or not to say anything. But then I realized that he had to know how loud he was being and that it wasn't unlikely that he'd be overheard. I also didn't like the idea of a guy I had just met for the first time doing what he was doing in my bathroom. So I knocked.
The moans and groans stopped at once. I asked, "Are you okay?"
The toilet flushed, the tap ran, the door opened, and he brushed past me, out of the house, into his car, and drove away without a word. At least one of us had fun that night, I guess.
Well... what happened on the SECOND date?
ReplyDelete"If I jerk off real quick before we head out I'll be able to focus just on her."
ReplyDeleteMisguided and strange, but what good intentions. I think.
Shouldn't you be doing this at home?
ReplyDeleteDid you try some of his "hair gel?"
ReplyDeleteAnother good reason not to invite the first date to your house.
ReplyDeleteAnd now, to crown the new Emperor of the A$$hats
ReplyDelete*snap* {glug} >That's the sound of the rubber gloves going on, and a bottle of bleach being set down as I spent a few hours scouring the bathroom and tossing out everything that wasn't bolted down...and cussing at myself for being stupid for letting a stranger into my home.
ReplyDeleteI hope you didn't have a hamper or something in that bathroom. If you did, your underthings are probably missing now.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure he went through that hamper.
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