Windows 95

Story Sent in by Sandra:

My first year in college, I met Alan through friends. He had an offbeat personality and took a liking to me immediately. He brought me flowers and called me a couple times a day just to say hi. I was unsure about him at first, but soon warmed up to him and we went out on a date.

I was living on campus and he picked me up in his car. The first thing I noticed is that it had no windows. It had a windshield and a rear window, but the door windows were gone, replaced with thin cellophane of different colors. Blue, pink, orange, and red. Well, that was different.

When I stepped into his car he said, "No windows since 1995. Yee haw!" and he slammed on the gas.

We tore out of campus and jetted around town. I asked him, "Where are we going?"

He said, "No idea. Just thought you'd want to drive around in the Alanmobile for a while. See how the street lights change colors as we drive by them?"

He was right. Lights indeed appear to be different colors depending on the color of cellophane you look through. That's... really something.

After driving around the same block about a dozen times I asked him again, "What are we up to, tonight?"

He said, "This is all I got. Had enough already?"

I had spent a long time readying for our date. I was expecting dinner. Something exciting. And this was the best he had come up with? Were all college guys like this?

"Want to get dinner?" I finally suggested.

He ignored that and said, "Check this out!"

We were coming up on a part of town that had trees decked out in Christmas tree lights. "Whoa! Look at the colors!" he said as we drove by. Wow.

"Nice. We doing dinner?" I asked.

He didn't answer, but instead drove me back to my dorm and told me to get out of his car. I did and he drove off.

When my friends asked me how the date went, I told them there wasn't really much of one. Apparently, he later told some people that he got all kinds of action out of me, but of course my friends believed me. I can't imagine that his "dating" technique ended up wooing much of anyone.