(Wound your characters. Why? Find out on this week's Jared's Inkwell! -JMG)
Story Sent in by Ruben:
Carol seemed really distracted and stressed on our dinner date. Was it me?
"No," she said, "I'm under lots of stress and I have three deadlines at work this week that'll be impossible for me to make without working 30-hour days."
I asked, "Is there anyone in your department who can help you?"
She snapped, "I'm the only one who knows anything! This is all on me! I have deadlines! I should be there right now, working on them. Instead I'm here!"
Noted. I said, "You can go." And you know what? I meant it. Seriously. I didn't really want to be on a date with a distracted, nervous, and rather rude woman. If she had more important things to do, I was sure I could find more important things of my own.
"No!" she said dramatically, "Don't try to guilt me! I'll stay here with you! Even though I'm dead if I don't hit my deadlines! It's okay! I'm here! On this date! With you! Let's have a great time!"
Captain Sarcasm was really on fire, that night. I simply shrugged and said, "Okay. Let's have a great time."
"Yes! It's not like I have 50 freaking deadlines to hit! I'll just sit here with you! All night long!"
"Sounds good. The chicken here is really good. I've heard it's free-range. And good."
"Good! Order it! Order anything you want! I'll even pay!"
"Really?"
"Yes! I'll be late on my deadlines and I'll pay! My entire life's already screwed, so why stop now?"
This was a crazy train I'd gladly board. I thanked her for her offer and ordered that free-range chicken I liked so much. She laughed and stopped laughing at odd intervals, like she was replaying some comedy show in her head over and over. We didn't speak much, or really at all.
When the check came, sure as her word, she paid it in full. I thanked her. She laughed even louder and then left without a goodbye.
9/24/2014
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This sounds like an episode of Seinfeld.
ReplyDeleteOr a combination of every Meg Ryan character ever.
ReplyDelete^ For the WIN!
ReplyDeleteReally? No comments on the OP being a dinner wh0re?
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with the OP. Why is she going on a date when she allegedly had so much work due?
ReplyDeleteHonestly...is the chicken THAT good? :-/
ReplyDelete