Why Guys Insist on Paying

Story Sent in by Mark:

When the time came to pay at dinner, I pulled out my wallet to pay for both of us but Olivia stopped me in my tracks. She offered to pay for the whole thing and said, "Don't worry about it. Really. I'll probably end up owing you even more, soon enough."

Intrigued and a little alarmed, I asked her, "What do you mean?"

She said, "I'll show you once we're done here."

She paid, I thanked her, and we left. She led me to her car and she said, "What do you see?"

It was a silver sedan. Not much else to it. "A silver car," I said.

She then gave me a sultry look and brushed my arm, then said, "Wanna take a ride?"

She drove us a little way out of town, to a dark area I didn't recognize. She parked and said, "We're near Cedar Hill Cemetery. Do you know what happened here?"

I said, "People were buried?"

She said, "Besides that."

"Um... someone was murdered?"

"No."

"Er... it's a popular make-out spot?"

She rolled her eyes and said, "No."

"Then I don't know. Tell me."

She said, "You have to guess."

"I really have no idea."

She said, "Well you have to guess. I paid for dinner, so that's the least you can do."

I said, "That's dumb. We could be here all night while I try to guess."

"Then we'll be here all night."

"Are you serious?"

She turned to me, inserted a dramatic pause for effect, and said, "Dead serious."

We were a long way from my car. She had lured me there under unstated but clearly false pretenses. All I wanted to do was either have some action or go home. Playing a guessing game while trapped wasn't my idea of a good date.

I asked, "Maybe we can at least take a walk?"

She said, "No. You guess or we just wait here."

I looked out the window and pretended to think of the answer while I silently pulled out my phone and texted a friend to come pick me up. I could've walked back to my car, but as I said it was several miles away and I'd rather owe a buddy a solid than trod through the suburban boonies at 10pm.

My friend said he'd swing over and I pretended to keep thinking and I made all kinds of stupid guesses. "A ceiling fan was stolen from here?" "A chicken was made to dance the cha-cha?" "A baby was turned into a tyrannosaurus?" All wrong, each guess. She didn't seem to lose her patience, though. She really wanted me to guess whatever it was had happened there. I even thought that it might've been a poorly-designed come-on and I tried to put the moves on her but she pushed me away.

Finally, my friend pulled up behind us. I jumped out of her car. She yelled, "Hey!" but I wasn't about to explain myself. I made for my friend's car and we took off. I wondered if she'd follow us, and she did for about a block before calling it quits.

I made it back to my car without incident and called it a night.