Whatever Floats Your Bloat

Story Sent in by Timothy:

It was a fun date with Mona. But after drinking her root beer float, she said, "I feel sick and bloated," and ran for the bathroom.

While she was away, the waitress delivered another root beer float to the table, putting it right in front of me. I told the waitress that we hadn't ordered a second float. The waitress pointed at Mona's seat and told me, "Your friend just ordered it for you."

I wasn't about to drink the whole thing down, as Mona had hinted that her own had made her ill. I sipped at it, instead.

When Mona came back, she looked fine. But she also looked disappointed. "What's with this?" she asked, pointing to my float.

"Thanks for ordering one for me. Didn't you say it made you sick, though?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I wanted to see if you'd get sick, too."

I was flabbergasted. "You ordered me something to see if I'd get sick from it?"

She said, "Yeah. Is that a problem?"

My first impulse was to enumerate the hundreds of ways that yes, it was indeed a problem. Instead, I mentally crossed her name off of my second-date list and said, "Nope. But I'm too full to have any of it. You want any?"

She frowned and shook her head. Soon afterward, the date ended.