I tossed emails back and forth with Jamie and when the time came for us to plan a date, she invited me, over the phone, to "watch the fireworks from the roof" of her apartment building.
This wasn't anytime near the Fourth of July (it was winter, in fact) but she swore that that coming Saturday night there'd be fireworks in her town.
We enjoyed an early dinner out and as it grew dark, we made it to her apartment building roof, bundled up against the cold.
After an hour and a half of talking and waiting, it was pretty dark out and I asked her, "When are the fireworks supposed to start?"
"What fireworks?"
"The ones I came up here to see."
"I never said anything about fireworks."
"...yes you did."
"No, I didn't."
She absolutely, positively, 100% had mentioned fireworks. Multiple times. I was ready to bust out our emails as proof until I realized that she had asked me over the phone to come see the fireworks, not by email.
She denied over and over ever mentioning fireworks, and when I tried to kiss her, she pushed me away. So I went home without fireworks and without a desire for a second date. Bah humbug.
This was her first test. If you came over, and fireworks just happened to spontaneously erupt over the skyline in the middle of winter, then you passed the first test, and can proceed to the next one.
ReplyDeleteBecause, you know, it makes perfect sense...
KatieGirl has a pyrotechnic crew follow her around everywhere she goes, because fireworks must go off every time she kisses one of her random Match guys that she sees behind her boyfriend's back.
ReplyDeleteBEST RELATIONSHIP EVARRR!
@ Steve - Love the KatieGirl meme!
ReplyDeleteYet another case of a clueless OP leaving his poor date with EVS. Hello, "fireworks" is code for sex. It doesn't take Fellini to figure that one out. Then you berate her about "fireworks" and wonder why she won't kiss you....humm. EVS claims another victim.
Bwahahaha!
ReplyDeleteWho cares about fireworks? You are on the roof with her. Make your own. That said, this seems like a pretty uneventful bad date for this site.
ReplyDeleteThe latest outbreak of EVS claims another victim.
ReplyDeleteOP's date promised fireworks and he wants to pull out his imaginary emails instead of his dick. They are waiting for you at Chumps Men's Sauna for some special retraining as clearly pussy is completely wasted on you.
ReplyDeleteTryN2Fly, I adore you so much! And OP, geez...
ReplyDeleteBig kiss to you too Tanette.......and a little inappropriate fondling.
ReplyDeleteTo the uninitiated, if they exist...
ReplyDeleteNevermind look it up.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteHmm I Googled EVS and there are several possibilities...
ReplyDeleteI'll give the "uninitiated" a multiple choice:
Extreme Velocity Sports
Electric Vehicle(s)
Eastern Vascular Society
Eastern Video Systems
Economic and Valuation Services
Electro-Optical Viewing System
Emergency Vehicle Services
Employer Verification Service
Empty Vagina Syndrome
Endoscopic Variceal Sclerotherapy
Engine Valve Springs
Enhanced Voltage Stress
Entertainment Vision Sensor
Enumeration Verification System
European Valuation Standards
Exact Visible Set
Exchange Virtual Server
Exclusive Viewing Show
Expected Value Score
Extravehicular Suit
Extreme Video Solutions
Extreme Voltage Shutdown
... though I guess most of these still fit with all the comments here