I had been on a few dates with Nina. On the last date, this past April, we were out together in my car. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary and we were talking together like usual. I needed gas so I stopped at a self-serve station.
I had barely hopped out of my car to start pumping gas when she poked her head out of her window and asked, "What's taking so long?"
"I need to fill the tank. Give me a minute."
She said, "Give you a minute?"
I didn't respond to that as I thought that my answer was pretty clear. Then she said again, "Give you a minute?"
Next thing I knew, she was out of my car and storming away into the night. I stopped pumping gas and ran after her. When I caught up, she said, "Oh! Looks like you're done!" She then stomped back into my car, slammed the door shut, and didn't say a word to me for the rest of the night. Yep. Last date.
Let me give it to you straight, Sam. There is not one woman on this planet that will or should put up with your unhealthy obsession with filling your car up with gas for just one minute. We're dainty fucking flowers, man! Flowers die when they're exposed to gas fumes for JUST ONE MINUTE! You clearly tried to kill poor Nina with your gas pumping for just one minute stunt. I'm on to you!
ReplyDeleteAlso, people who use self service gas stations are very blue collar. Damn grease monkeys, all of you.
What the OP left out was his comment right before he got out of the car:
ReplyDelete"Hang on a minute cunt, I need some gas."
Next time, aim the pump nozzle at your cunty date, squeeze the lever, fling a lighter, and walk away.
ReplyDelete^The Girl who Played with Fire...
ReplyDelete^ Haha, you like Hunger Games!
ReplyDelete^The Girl who Played with Fire is the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, not to be confused with the Girl who was on Fire. Or the Girl who Waited. Or the Girl with the Pearl Earring. Or the Girl who Loved Tom Gordon. Or the Girl who Fell from the Sky.
ReplyDelete...I must be bored.
Damn, you're right luna-luna. Sorry SmallCityGirl. Those are much better books.
ReplyDeleteI like Hunger Games! They're awesome! Reminds me of home.
ReplyDeleteOp, you should have just left her there! I get left at gas stations all the time by my "dates"! A nice trucker always comes along and picks me up so there was nothing to worry about.
She was jealous that you were pumping ethyl...Let me guess...she was a red head with a fire crotch...?
ReplyDeleteI don't know about y'all, but when I watched the Hunger Games movie, *I* was rooting for the oppressive government!
ReplyDeleteOppressive government > angsty teens.
Nina with a tilde (tealday ~) (neenya) means "little girl" in Spanish.
ReplyDeleteAm I the only woman around here that like a guy to pump for more than a minute?
ReplyDeleteAND, Green Green, I think you'll find it's called The Banana Games in your family.
I'm with blue, you should have left her there instead of going after her to help her to learn that such behavior is not okay.
ReplyDelete