The Bestial Aroma of Crazy

Story Sent in by Heidi:

I was in Ben's car when he pulled over to a gas station to fill the tank. Once he was done, he went inside the store. He didn't come back for a while, so I called him. I figured that he was in the bathroom, although he had been gone a long while, even for that.

He didn't answer his phone, so I left the car and went inside. There were a couple of other customers browsing but no Ben anywhere. I asked the clerk if she had seen Ben, and I described him for her. She said he paid for the gas and hadn't seen him since. I checked the bathrooms and there was no sign of him in there.

I looked around the store once more then went outside, where I found Ben in back. He just sat there motionless on the grass, staring at the moon.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

He said, "It's a full moon. My ancestors used its light to hunt by. Now I use it to pump gas. Why have we fallen so low?"

I said, "I don't know. Want to get dinner?"

He asked, "As in, hunt for dinner? On the ancient plains and savannas?"

"As in a restaurant. With me. Now." As I approached him closer, I detected a weird smell that I couldn't place.

He tore a clump of grass and held it up at me. "My lady, this is the feast I have gathered for you. With more time, I could fashion a spear to take down even the mightiest beast."

I said, "I really wanted to do dinner with you tonight. Maybe you can catch me a saber-toothed tiger next time."

"Promise?" he asked.

"Promise." I said. He held his hand out to me, I helped him up, we returned to his car, and took off for dinner. He moped the whole time, mumbling about how the food would taste better if he went out and caught it, himself. Did I mention that he had chicken for dinner?

Second and last date.