(How does location affect character? Click here to find out on this week's Jared's Inkwell! -JMG)
Story Sent in by Ricky:
I took Cecilia to dinner at a Japanese restaurant that was situated a flight of steps up from the street. Walking up the steps went fine, dinner went fine, putting on our coats after dinner went fine. It was a good date.
When we left the restaurant, I held the door open for Cecilia and let her go first. As she proceeded downstairs, just in front of me, she lost her footing and stumbled.
Instinctively, I reached out and put an arm around her and pulled her back, saving her from a tumble.
She shoved my arm away and said, "You did that on purpose!"
I was stunned, "Did what? Save you? I–"
"You put a trick step there to make me fall so you could touch me!"
Innocent me glanced down at the innocent step. "These steps are concrete."
"I hate them! And I hate you!" she railed, then kicked at the step, wobbled a bit, then spun around and stormed away from me, the steps, and any chance at a second date.
I use trick steps to lure trashsluts back to my trailer, so I can have sex with them on a pile of garbage twice while my twin watches.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who works at an architecture firm, I can tell you that we install at least one trick step in every 6 to ensure men/women can molest their dates with a credible excuse. Also, so old women break their hips. But that's just helping natural selection along.
ReplyDeleteI made a movie about pushing my date down steps so I could get a grope. My dad said it played on HBO.
ReplyDeleteI am confused about why the girl hated op? if she did why did she agree to go out with him in the front place?
ReplyDelete@ Blue Blue - Probably because he groped her in the front place.
ReplyDeleteEvery day it becomes more clear that BlueBlue is really
ReplyDeleteD.A.R.Y.L
I have magical skills or powers that no ordinary human kids or adults have? that awesome fizziks!!!!!! thanks for recoginzing that!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletehttp://youtu.be/QzRsHrW6ccA?t=49s
ReplyDeleteOP got his moves from Kevin Hart!
Saggy, my adoration of you has taken a step up. (Okay it's the best I can do. I'm not clever like the rest of you.) But we all know that the step is to blame. The step saw her coming and thought: "let me see if that guy will molest her if I just move myself up a little bit when she comes down me." Asshole step.
ReplyDeleteAnd Blue, she couldn't very well go out with him in the back place...or could she?
ReplyDeleteNah you can't hypontiez people from the back place
ReplyDeleteYou guys are all hilarious but D.A.R.Y.L is my favorite
ReplyDeleteDon't forget about my other brother D.A.R.Y.L.
ReplyDelete