Profile Sent in by Amanda:
About Me:
A long time ago I was posed a question: Sex or the saw, boy? Sex is, well, nobody knows. But the saw, the saw is family. Sooooo, it's finally time I thought about settling down and starting a family of my own. That don't mean I'm just lookin for anyone. I strictly follow a no B*tch Hog policy! A man builds a good sturdy trade by hookin' and crookin' and then Ka plooey! The Gods just kick him right in the balls. Ah no! Not this time...
A little about me: I'm orig. from the great state of Texas. I like to consider myself having a "hippie"-like mentality and view on life. Music is my life! I'm a huge fan of Iron Butterfly and Humble Pie. I'm also a Butcher by trade: No secret, it's the meat. Don't skimp on the meat. I've got a real good eye for prime meat. Runs in the family! Cook's out here chewing ass like it was steak... We gotta run for that money now! Chase that dollar, boy! Gotta go fast to catch it!
What I'm looking for:
Athletic or petite and sexy! As for BIG BONED women, well...aint nothing wrong with a bonus body! I mean, look at all that beef!
Somewhere out there, there's a girl who's like "Well, at least he's honest and down-to-earth!" and is making plans to meat him.
ReplyDeleteYa I don't know what sex is either. Need to go and check Wikipedia.
ReplyDeleteCan someone translate the first paragraph?
ReplyDeleteThe "What i'm looking for" part was golden haha. Golden!
ReplyDelete@Snarkastic - The first paragraph, and the second for that matter, is pretty much entirely comprised of Texas Chainsaw Massacre quotes and references. Even his favorite bands are appropriated from one of the characters of the movie.
ReplyDeleteAside: I believe that pretty much anyone who says "Music is my life!" has developed their musical tastes by a similar method.