That Blasted Restaurant

Story Sent in by Meredith:

Paul told me that he made reservations for the two of us at a very ritzy hotel restaurant for our first date. We met in the lobby, and he looked great.

He kissed me on the cheek, said, "You look beautiful," to me, and we walked to the restaurant.

The host gave us a smile as we approached. "Good evening," he said, "Do you have a reservation?"

Paul replied, "Yes. Should be under... John." He winked at me.

The host said, "John who?"

Paul frowned, became a bit flustered, and replied, "John... uh... John."

"John John?" the host said, "Let me see here..." He searched through his reservation book and said, "I don't have a reservation under that name, sir."

Paul said, "Try Jack."

"Jack who?"

"Jack... John." Paul flashed me a smile, but I didn't smile back.

"I'm sorry, sir. Nothing under Jack John. Are you sure you made a reservation with us?"

Paul said to the host, "I'm going to use fertilizer to blow you up!" then said to me, "Come on. We have a fertilizer errand to run."

He stormed away and I followed him. He muttered to me, "I called you beautiful, so you have to help me, now."

I asked, "Uh, what's your plan?"

He replied, "I'm going to blow up that place. With fertilizer."

I said, "Maybe we could have dinner, first? I'm sure we can find another place. I thought you made reservations there, though."

He replied, "I don't have to make reservations," then turned back around and headed for the restaurant again. I followed him once more, but a few extra steps behind.

This time, he said to the host, "I need no reservation."

The host said, "We're booked solid for tonight, sir. I'm afraid if you don't have a reservation, there's nothing I can do."

Paul once again said, "Fine. I will blow you up. With fertilizer."

He spun and walked past me, saying, "Come with me, Meredith. We'll go get fertilizer together."

I walked alongside him and said, "I think we should just do dinner somewhere else, but if you're planning to blow this place up, then you can go ahead and do that while I go get dinner, myself." I was disappointed that I had gone through the trouble to look nice for him, but in retrospect, I'm glad that he showed me who he really was so soon.

Paul stopped walking and said, "Okay. I'm going to Home Depot to get fertilizer. Once I'm done blowing this place up, I'll call you and you tell me where you're having dinner. I'll meet you there."

"Sounds good."

Paul and I went our separate ways. However, as we had met, spoken, and made all plans for the date online, he didn't have my number, so he never called. He also never wrote me, and as far as I know, never blew up that nice hotel restaurant.