Profile Sent in by Murray:
Who I'm looking for:
I'd like a nice guy who realizes that respect workes both ways. I will treat you well and I expect to be treated well in exchange. I want us to be able to work out our problems. No screaming, yelling, or raised voices necessary. Just mature, open, and honest discussion. You, me, and the desire to resolve things both firmly entrenched in our hearts.
I want kids so I would like it if you also want them. I don't know how many I want but that I think is also up for open, frank, honest discussion. I like to think of myself as mature, although I do like to cut loose every now and again. If the situation presents itself, I will do what I feel is right.
Also not minding if I pee on you/your friends occasionally would be great. Well I guess that's it. I hope to hear from you!
Now I know some haters are bound to bomb on this gal for the abrupt 180 her profile takes, but I commend her being upfront about her proclivities (especially the desire to pee on not only her potential partner, but also his friends).. The warning has been thrown out there.
ReplyDeleteSo if you take a gamble and end up like the OP here -
http://www.abadcaseofthedates.com/2009/10/ultimate-mood-killer.html -
you really have no one to blame but yourself.
nrrdcore, I think the profile is a man's since they say they're a "nice guy" and women don't tend to refer to themselves as "guys". (Yes, I know there are exceptions out there, that's why I said "tend to".)
ReplyDeleteProps for being upfront about the urolangia, I guess. Although steering clear of people who continually describe themselves as "nice guys" and "mature" (because if you're actually nice and mature, you wouldn't need to describe yourself as such, it would be apparent from your behavior) seems to be a good rule of thumb, anyway.
I think it's a woman. She wrote, "I'd like a nice guy."
ReplyDeleteOr it could be the profile of a West African frog, like the kind that changes gender, similar to those they use to make dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.
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ReplyDeleteDAMMIT. READING FAIL.
ReplyDeleteAlthough they still could be a man. I mean, gay dudes exist and there are some who are into peeing on people and all that. Buuuut I have no idea since I haven't seen the profile or whatever. So yeah.
But in any case, does this mean they haven't gotten the memo about Nice Guys yet?
I think there's a troll in the dungeon.
ReplyDeleteWhat, am I supposed to be the troll in the dungeon? Someone else? You? Jesus? David Bowie?
ReplyDeleteNo, sorry, just the OP writing the pee profile. It makes me think the last part was thrown in as a joke or as revenge, though it might be sincere, who knows? David Bowie is Jesus. Sexy, sexy Jesus.
DeleteAh, je sais.
ReplyDeleteDavid Bowie is my personal savior.