8/05/2011

Treachery at the 'Ol Swimmin' Hole

Story Sent in by Alex:

Brenda was a girl I found on a dating site. She had a great sense of humor and made me laugh quite a bit. She was also very pretty, so asking her out was a no-brainer.

I had planned to take her out for hibachi, and she had agreed to that idea. It wasn't until I had been waiting at the place for 10 minutes when she called me and asked, "Do you feel like skinny dipping? I feel like skinny dipping, instead."

It was quite a departure from dinner, but surprised as I was, I told her, "Sure. You positive you want to do that on a first date?"

She replied, "Meet you here!" and hung up. Only problem was that I didn't know where "here" was. She had hung up before she gave me a location. I called her back and left a message on her voicemail.

I knew of a couple of places in the area that would qualify for good, secluded bathing locations. They weren't far from each other, so I drove to both of them, thinking that she could've been at either.

She wasn't. I tried her again. Voicemail. I thought that I'd pull over and wait for a little bit, as I figured that she'd call me once she realized her mistake.

Instead, I received a photo message from her. It was a shot of herself in the water, immersed to her neck. It was a shot that seemed impossible for her to have taken herself. I texted back, "Did you want to meet up? I need to know where you are."

In response, she sent me five more photos in rapid succession. They were of her smiling, laughing, and splashing, all, apparently at the same swimming hole. With this set, I was positive: she definitely wasn't alone. There were at least two shots of her with her hands in the air, and taken from different angles.

I tried her phone once more. Voicemail. I gave up and went home.

That night, she sent me an email with the subject line: :)

Attached were a dozen photos of her, in the water, with another guy, hugging, laughing, and one of him kissing her cheek.

Well, great. I didn't reply.

8 comments:

  1. This might have been a bad date if a date had actually occurred...

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  2. ^ The date did occur. Just not with the OP.

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  3. I bet you spanked it like an out of control sewing machine to those pictures, didn't ya?

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  4. "She won't answer my calls?! SCREW IT I'M GOING TO EVERY LAKE NEARBY TITTIES TITTIES TITTIES"

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  5. Yeah, admittedly I would've considered the date over when my would-be date cancelled plans at the last minute while I waited at the agreed-upon place, esp. if she said she was going skinny-dipping without telling me where.

    But (not to wax too philosophical here), in order for there to be bad dates, someone must be a bit of a tool...

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  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  7. And to think you clearly had the green light to fondle her all the live long day...

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  8. I would LOVE to hear those voicemails :P

    "HI, this is "OP", i'm sorry, you probably forgot to tell me where you are. PLease call me asap so i can get there"

    "Hi, this is "OP" again, nice pictures! I've been to X, Y and Z now and still can't find you, where are you at? Please call back asap!"

    "Hi, this is "OP" again, can't you please call me?! Those pictures are nice, but are you alone? IT seems hard to takes those pictures alone, but never mind, call me fast and i'll be there!"

    D-E-S-P-E-R-A-T-E

    Read it out, kid. She obviously dodged a bullet here, but she did it in a mean way.

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