Email Sent in by Hal:
Hi Hal.
I'm so grateful that you think what I'm doing is great. Maybe there's hope for me after all!
It took me a while to acclimate to life in the southeast. People are friendlier here, but I also think that they're less reserved with being judgmental. No filters. It's okay, just a little unexpected!
I want to open up an alternative medicine practice but it's a bit difficult given that most of my materials are tightly regulated! Of course this is because of drug companies. I was in Sumatra ten years ago and had powdered rhino horn mixed in with a drink and since then I haven't been sick once. It's amazing but big pharma is just too powerful. It's a shame because it could save so many lives.
I'm taking a trip back to southeast asia to get more rhino horn. The public must know!
What are you up to this weekend?
Mary
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Stop her.
Personally, I find that nothing helps the constitution quite like fresh panda liver. Or Dolphin brains.
ReplyDeleteSince I had group up human vertebrae, I'm immune to cancer!
ReplyDeleteI ate a baby and now I don't age! It's amazing! The anti-cannibal laws are just the man trying to keep the secret hidden! The public must know!!
ReplyDeleteA dingo ate my baby. But dingo meat can pass for dog in a pinch.
ReplyDeleteI love the added link there.
ReplyDeletePeople like Mary are the reason tigers may soon become extinct.
Tigers will never be extinct, silly Gnome! Everyone knows that if you eat a tiger, not only will you never have a sore back again, but two new baby tigers appear in the jungle for free.
ReplyDeleteI love the dis-logic here.
ReplyDeleteRhino horn isn't illegal because the animal is nearly extinct, it's because Big Pharma wants it all for themselves!
Mary might be interested in this Tiger repelling stone I have right here.
ReplyDelete