Iron it Out

Story Sent in by Pedro:

Online, Brenda came off as friendly. In person, she was a bit different. We agreed to meet at a bookstore and have lunch afterward.

We had been browsing through the bookstore and I was thumbing through an art book when she came up to me and said, "You're a pathetic asshole."

I looked around to make sure that she was talking to me. I replied, "Excuse me?" She didn't respond anything other than give me a slight smile. I continued, "I… what's going on?"

She said, "You heard me, moron. Are you an idiot?"

"I–"

"You pathetic moron."

I asked her, "Did I miss something?"

She squinted at me, breathed heavily, and trembled a fair amount. It went on for almost a full minute before I replaced the book on the shelf and said, "Look, I'm sorry, but I'm probably going to go."

"You're leaving me?"

That was the opposite of the expected response, and I hesitated. Then, I replied, "I… yeah. This doesn't seem to be a good… thing."

"Fine. Give up. Doesn't mean that I have to, though."

I stepped away from her, just a little bit. "Huh?"

"It takes two people to end a date for a date to be over. That's the rule. And I don't want it to be over. I'm not ending the date with you, so you can't end the date with me."

I said, "I'm leaving, so you can stay here and continue on the date by yourself. That sound good?"

I waited a moment to give her the courtesy of a response. She didn't say anything, but she did stare, and that was enough for me. I turned and left.

She followed me out. I made it to my car, and was able to enter it and lock the doors. Then, I drove towards my house. It didn't take me long to see in my mirrors that she was following me, in her own car, very closely.

Instead of driving home, I drove through various side streets and circled blocks. She followed. I had three-quarters of a tank of gas, and I hoped it was more than she had. Still, I didn't like the idea of driving around for the better part of an afternoon. What to do, what to do…

I drove to the outskirts of town. She was right behind me. I sped up. She sped up with me. I slowed down, and she was right on her brake. As if reading my mind, she texted me, "I planned for this and have a full tank. How about u? :)"

I thought about pulling into a police station and honking my horn, but decided that I'd try something else, first.

With her right behind me, I drove us well out of town. Once we were on a rural mountain road, I pulled over suddenly and popped the trunk. She pulled over, too. In an instant, I jumped out. She jumped out also. I made it to my trunk, pulled out a tire iron, yelled, "Check it out!" and advanced on her. I had absolutely no intent on using it, but I wanted to frighten her.

She yelped and jumped back into her car. I ran for her door and she tore away, clipping my rear bumper in the process. Still, she was gone, and I had precious little time to go before she came back. I turned around in the car and drove away, back toward town, although to be safe, I pulled off onto a side road for about ten minutes before continuing on.

I feel bad for resorting to a threat of violence (which I have to emphasize, I would never have followed through. If she called my bluff, I would've been out of luck), and I know that it wasn't the ideal way to resolve things. By the same token, I never heard from her again.