4/22/2011

Turned On, But Not in the Good Way

Story Submitted by Duncan:

Mary and I had been seeing each other for a little while when she asked me if I wanted to stay over at her apartment.  Knowing what that potentially meant, I looked forward to it.

Sure enough, not long after I had arrived there, we watched some television in her living room and things became hot and heavy.  I asked her, "Want to move this to the bedroom?" and she nodded.  We departed the living room but left the television on.

She led me into her bedroom, sat me down on the bed, then turned on both lamps in the room.  "I'll be right back," she said.

I thought that she had left to turn the living room television off, but instead I not only heard its volume increase but she also turned on the television she had in the kitchen as well as the radio in her bathroom. 

When she returned, she turned on the TV there in the bedroom and said, "Okay, now that's better."

I asked her, "What's going on?"

She said, "Before I have sex, I have to turn on every electric appliance that I have: lights, TVs, radios, dishwashers, everything."

"Why?"

"Reduces guilt."

I said, "Oh.  We don't have to have sex if you're going to feel guilty about it."

"I won't feel guilty now, since everything is on."

It was noisy, but I was still up for it if she was.  We started back up with the messing around, but then she pulled away.  "I'll be right back.  Sorry."  She left the room again, then returned.  "I forgot to turn the toaster on."

She then took my hands in hers and said, "I don't think I can do this."

I said, "That's okay.  Want me to go?"

"Would you mind?  I'm sorry."

She walked me to the door of her apartment, said goodnight, and closed her door.  I waited outside for a minute or two to hear if she would turn down all of her TVs, but instead the noise of the multiple televisions was joined by the sound of someone stomping loudly.

I left, wrote her a nice, understanding email, and never heard from her after that.

6 comments:

  1. Like so many other stories here, I can't help but think that this chick didn't wanna have sex, and came up with some ridiculous way to try and creep the guy out, or just make him uncomfortable enough so that he declines. When that doesn't work, she reverts to the "I don't think I can do this" and boots him out.

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  2. She invited him over, she assented in fooling around, she led him to the bedroom. Then she turns him down? She was either ridiculously ignorant or ridiculously nuts. Either way, this guy dodged a bullet.

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  3. To combat guilt, she wastes resources. Of course.

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  4. I have to applaud the title.

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  5. I like the lights on during sex. Maybe this woman is taking it to the logical extreme.

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