Illegal Sea Foods

Story Submitted by Jack:

Elana was a teacher I met online.  She had a very well-written profile, and she seemed very personable and friendly.  After a week or two of emails, I asked her out to a nice seafood restaurant for dinner.

Not too far into the date, she said, "This is a really nice place.  But I bet that as a lawyer, you're used to such places."

I shrugged.  "Not really."

"You must make a tidy sum, practicing law."

I replied, "I do all right.  Probably not half as much as you're thinking."

"Like how much?"

I laughed and said, "Enough to take care of dinner.  Don't worry."

She said, "Seriously, how much?"

"Enough."

"Enough being what?  Sixty thousand?  Seventy?"

I sighed.  "I'm not going to tell you how much I make."

"Why not?  How much do you make?"

I tried to change the subject.  "For how long have you taught?"

"Don't change the subject.  How much do you make?"

"I'm not going to tell you."

"But you can!  How much do you make?"

I raised my voice slightly and said, "I'm not going to tell you.  What does it matter?"

"Uh, there's a big difference between thirty grand and a hundred, so it matters.  How much do you make?"

I asked, "What's been your biggest challenge as a teacher?"

"How much do you make?"

"Can we talk about you for a little bit?"

She smiled and repeated, "How much do you make?  How much do you make?  How much do you make?  How much do you—"

"Shut up!" I shouted.  She jumped.  It might have been harsh, but I wanted her to shut up.  She didn't say a word to me, look me in the eye, or eat for the rest of dinner.  When the bill came, I held up just enough money for my share and said, "Sorry, I don't make enough to cover you," put it on the table, and left her and her immaturity, there and then.