E-mail Submitted by Andrew:
In a room lit by candles, you wait for me on the bed. A warm breeze wafts through the window. I open the door slowly, wearing a sheer nightie with barely anything on underneath. You sit up and take notice. The candlelight bathes my body as I step closer to you.
You reach out to me. I lean in to give you a soft kiss. You sit up, unable to stop yourself, and in doing so, you jostle the nightstand where a candle flickers. It falls to the floor, igniting the carpeting. The smell of smoke fills our nostrils, and we gulp it down as I climb on top of you. The house bursts into searing flames around us as we make love and it collapses down on top of us. We're dead!
Fire safety is very important.
Barbara
wtf
ReplyDeleteI think somebody has watched the "Love the way you lie" video one time too many.
ReplyDeleteOkay really??? If someone knocked a candle over, there would be plenty of time to put it out and get back to humping.
ReplyDeleteAnd even if there wasn't, there is NO sex good enough to make me want to burn to death just to get it.
Isn't this how "Like Water for Chocolate" ends? :P Never was able to see what was so sexy about that.
ReplyDeleteFire safety IS very important!
ReplyDelete. . . and they all lived happily ever after . . .
ReplyDeleteDaughter of Fire Marshall Bill?
ReplyDeleteI think she was trying to make a joke.
ReplyDeleteNomatophobia, me too.
ReplyDeleteI think a lot of people are uncomfortable sending cheesy e-mails so they use humour to lighten it up.
that said, she could be crazy so I`d get to know her before I gave an insane firebug my address but she may just be joking.
This is loads better than those creepy emails with descriptions no self-respecting romance novelist would put in their books.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of a "Man Stroke Woman" sketch though
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxlZD3oEfsU).
I would totally date that girl.
ReplyDeleteWell welcome TacoDave! You sound like just the sort of Luche-Libre-macho-taco we need to shake things up around here. It also helps you're from Beaver Town.
ReplyDeleteFun fact: I am Queen of Tacos.
ReplyDeleteMoving on: I liked her story. Agreed that we'd have to make sure she wasn't the type of girl to set whole books of matches on fire, but I would definitely written back to her. LOVE the last line.
How did you become Queen of Tacos, Nikki? I didn't know we voted! ;-)
ReplyDeleteAnd Error - nice pic. It's not as cool as my Austin Powers man rug, but it's close.
Pyrocourse--Making love while fire burns all around. Talk about fetishes.
ReplyDelete