How We Say Goodbye in German, Dr. Jones

Story Submitted by Christopher:

Jen was a friend who I knew was crushing on me for a while.  I wasn't into her, and despite telling her once that I wanted to stay friends, she didn't stop flirting through the years, so I made it policy to ignore her advances.

It so happened that I was exclusively dating another girl, Sara, when Jen called me to ask if I wanted to hang out.  Jen and I, as I said, were friends, and there was no harm in hanging out over lunch.

During the meal, I let slip that I was seeing Sara.  Jen rolled her eyes and made a face that clearly betrayed frustration, but she didn't say anything.  She invited me to her place after lunch, and I trusted myself enough to ensure that nothing would happen.

We sat down to watch a movie on a couch at her place when she sidled up close to me.  I headed her off at the pass with, "Jen, I don't think that's a good idea."

She leaned in and said, "Shh.  Close your eyes."

I had a feeling that she was going to kiss me, and I moved away from her on the couch.

She read my thoughts and said, "I promise I won't try anything.  Just close your eyes."

I sighed and closed them.  She rubbed her hand on my groin and I opened my eyes.  She was inches away from kissing me.

I jumped away and said, "Jen, I can't do this."

Faster than blinking, she lunged for me and slapped me in the face.  We stared at each other for a few seconds, and then she went right back to the movie, as if nothing had happened at all.

I left, and I haven't ever contacted her again.