Admitting De-feet. Heh.

Story Submitted by Meredith:

Dinner with Archie was a one-sided affair.  He talked a lot about himself, his life, his education, and his ex-girlfriend, who had obviously affected him greatly.

After dinner, I couldn't help but notice that he walked with a bit of a limp in his left foot.

"Everything okay?" I asked.

He glanced down at his shoes, which were, I noticed for the first time, on the wrong feet.

"I'm wearing my shoes on the wrong feet," he said, "I've been doing it for almost a year.  Since my breakup.  To remind me."

"That's probably bad for your back," I said, "To remind you of what?"

He said, "Of my breakup.  The day after, for the first time ever, I accidentally put my shoes on the wrong feet.  I don't know.  There's some kind of symbol there."

I stared at him, trying to find the right words.  "You've been walking around all year with your shoes on the wrong feet?"

"Until I find what I'm looking for," he said.

"A good podiatrist?  Or a therapist?" I blurted.  It was insensitive, I know.  But I had already decided that he was nuts.

"You don't understand!" he said, "You've never been in love, obviously."

"I have," I said, "But I've never been crazy enough to hurt myself in spite of it."

"Then you've obviously never been in love.  Love hurts," he said.

I had a sudden image of him bowling with his shoes on the wrong feet and doing a little dance, and I started laughing.

"Stop laughing!" he ordered, but I just couldn't get the picture out of my head.

"What do you want to do, now?" he asked.

"Go dancing.  Or do you have two left feet?" I laughed again.

He flared his nostrils.  I said, "I'm sorry.  I don't think this is going to work.  You're still hung up on someone."

"And you're a real bitch," he said.

And that's how we left it.