Like a Moth to High Beams

Submitted by Rory:

At a college study break that had degenerated into a drunken party, I met Kim, a petite blonde.  We talked for a while, kissed a fair amount, and I somehow had the presence of mind to ask her for her number.

I called her a few days later and asked her out.  All went according to plan, just the way I like it.

On our date, I couldn't help but notice that she wore no bra under a tight top.  I like that, too.

What I didn't like started just after the waitress took our drink orders.

"You were checking her out," Kim accused.

It was difficult, if not impossible for me to check out anything that night other than the bra-less girl sitting across the table from me.  I said, "No, I didn't," and it was the truth.

"Don't lie to me," Kim continued, "Don't forget who you're here with."

I remembered how nice it was the last time we had seen each other, when there was a bit less talking and a bit more fooling around.  Ah, nostalgia.

The waitress came back with our drinks, and we ordered our food.

After she left, Kim said, "You did it again."

I said, "I just looked at her when I ordered.  I'm allowed to look at a waitress when I order my dinner, aren't I?"

"There's a difference between 'looking' and 'checking out.'  You were checking her out."

I asked Kim to show me the difference between the two.  She said, "This is looking," and then glanced up and down quickly, as if the waitress was still there.  Then, she said, "This is checking her out," and then stared upwards, mouth agape.

"I didn't do that.  I just looked at her."

Then, Kim said, "Whatever.  Like she'd ever sleep with you.  Like anyone would."

Ouch, Kim!  That wasn't very nice.  I said, "Wow."

She asked, "What?"

And I said, "You're a real bitch.  Someone shit in your cereal?"

She made a hilarious face that looked like the mating of a raisin and a beaver.  She stood up, tried to shove the table at me (it was bolted down) and stormed off.

Both dinners came, and I had them wrapped up for myself to go.  Nothing wrong with having dinner for a couple of nights.

She called and texted me like the end of the world was going down, but I didn't acknowledge a single one of her messages.