Behold the Power

Submitted by Kevin:

Felicia appeared as a potential match on an online dating site.  She looked cute in her photos, and she mentioned an interest in 14th and 15th century literature, and talked about a forthcoming trip to Romania.  I asked her if she had family from Romania, and the only answer she gave me was, "Sort of, yes."

These interests seemed unusual, but I was looking for someone a little different from the, "I'm a teacher who likes biking and spending time with my family" sort, so I went the distance and asked her out.

"Okay, but only at night," she cautioned me.

"Are you a vampire?" I joked.

"It's spelled vampYre, and I'll tell you more in person," she said.

The red alert light blared, but I figured that there was no harm in meeting up.  Aside from the Dracula overtones, she was a better conversationalist than most people I spoke to in general, and she actually seemed interested in me.

We arranged to meet in front of a restaurant.  I expected her to show up in all black, wearing an upside-down cross, with artificial fangs, and pale eyes.  As it turned out, she showed up looking like she did in her pictures, a normal 23-year-old.  She had long blonde hair, glasses, and was dressed pretty conservatively.  If you didn't know it, you'd have no idea how obsessed with vampires she was.  But she was.

The first thing she said after our introductory hug was, "Can we get out of the light?"

I offered to walk her inside of the restaurant, and she glanced at it before saying, "I don't think so.  It's too bright in there.  Can we go to a bar?"

We went to a bar that served dinner items and sat in the darkest corner we could find.

She explained that she was a direct descendant of the historical Dracula, and that she was the first in her family for generations to make pilgrimage back to the ancestral homeland in Romania.  She said that she didn't drink alcohol (it diluted the blood), ate only meat (for strength and power), and avoided the light as much as possible.

I asked her if she had any powers, and she said that she did, but that she could only use them in times of great need.  I asked her to go into greater detail, and she explained that she could make time slow down, and that she could hover for brief periods.

"The blood's been diluted through the centuries," she said, "So I can't do everything that my ancestors were able to, but once I visit our old castle, I should increase in strength."

Maybe it was that I feigned interest more than anyone else had, but she really seemed to enjoy talking to me.  I tried changing the subject, but somehow or other we always made it back to vampirism.  She couldn't play sports because her supernatural athletic prowess would give her away (to be fair, she was in great shape).  She was in all honors classes throughout her schooling due to her fast brain powers, etc.

I asked her about her parents and siblings, as she had never mentioned them.  She said that she didn't really get along with them, as they denied the family heritage and thought that she was taking it too far.

She said, "I've hired two genealogists, and they both traced our family back to Dracula.  I'm not sure how much more proof I can show them."

The date wrapped up and I offered to walk her back to her car.  When we made it there, she offered to show me one of her powers, since I had been so understanding.

I hadn't expected this, and was so amazed that she'd offer it, that I took her up on it at once.

"Okay," she said, and took a step back.  She spread her arms and closed her eyes.  She breathed heavily and trembled.

She farted.

Her eyes opened and she put her hand to her mouth.  "Oh my God..." she began.

I laughed, then hugged her.  I told her that it was okay, and not to worry about it.

I didn't take her out for another date, but we're still acquaintances.  She ended up actually going to Romania, but I have no idea if her powers have increased as a result.