Submitted by Jan:
I met Wendell and we really hit it off. He found out that I liked to fish and invited me to come fishing with him. I took him up on his offer.
We launched his boat and tied up to the floating dock. He asked me to stay put while he went to the little store for bait. I sat on the dock with my feet in the boat, holding it against the wind. Thirsty, I leaned forward to get a beer out of the cooler but when I sat back down the dock wasn’t there. I hit the water in a backwards somersault and hit every oyster in my trajectory
When I pulled myself out of the water my leg was gushing blood. Folks launching a boat nearby asked if I was okay, and I said sure. They didn’t look convinced. Wendell trotted up and insisted he take me to the ER for stitches. I said no, that we were here to fish, just get me something to stop the bleeding. He came back from his car with a handful of Starbucks napkins. I pressed them against my leg, got in the boat, and told Wendell to cast off.
We fished under a nearby bridge for a while, him continually asking if I was okay, me dripping blood all over the place, getting blood on boat and gear, and catching nothing. I wondered if Wendell would pause to wash down his boat before racing me to the airport, or just cut his losses and call a taxi for me. I wondered if mixing beer and blood loss was a good idea. I also wondered if my tetanus shot was up to date
After getting the boat back on the trailer, Wendell stopped at a drugstore instead and patched me up.
Oh, and for our honeymoon? We went fishing. That was eight years ago.
Hooray for more "we met when I was a bad date" stories!! I think Jared is secretly just as much of a sap for these as I am. They break up the stupidity rather nicely. :D <3
ReplyDeleteWhen I saw that this story was by a girl, I thought the joke was gonna be that period blood got all over everything, hence the name of the story.
ReplyDeleteEeeeeewwwwwwwwwww, Roooobeeerrrrt!! *whiny teenage girl voice*
ReplyDeleteExcellent story despite it being a rather good date.
I don't know that it was a good date. From his perspective (before he fell in love), it would be pretty awful. His date falls into the water, bashes up her leg, is totally stubborn about getting help. She gets drunk on his boat and bleeds EVERYWHERE.
ReplyDeleteThen again, he DID get to act the hero and patch her up in the end. Still.
Yeah, I was not feeling the "No, no, I totally am going to ignore what's happening and just bleed over everything" bit. I know these two had plans but does that really require bleeding all over the boat and gear? How much fun could you guys have under the circumstances? Glad he stuck with you after having to mop up after you, OP. A
ReplyDeleteNikki, were you responding to my comment?
ReplyDeleteIf so, what I mean is that people get so worked up on here when JMG posts a bad date when one of the parties isn't an asshole. You don't have to have your date be an asshole where the guy refuses to drive you home until he gets a blowie for it to be a bad date.
Some people don't understand that even two people with chemistry and a happy ending can start off with a date that goes awry, which is still a bad date.
Hahaha, love it! I'm hoping your cuts were just shallow gashes that looked scarier than they actually were.
ReplyDeleteHappy eight years!
I once went on a fishing date with a bunch friends. We were all knocking back the brews and I guess we were kinda drunk.
ReplyDeleteBy accident I pressed the cast button on the back swing and sent the lure and hook into the cheek of a woman on the other side of dock. She screamed in pain, stumbled and fell into the water. I reeled her in trying not to let the hook slip out (I wasn't sure if she could swim).
When the others pulled her up I went over with pliers and got it out. I was careful so there wouldn't an ugly wound and scar tissue, in case we decided to get married. Right now we're still just dating.
Oh, the scar? Not bad on the way back to town we stopped at a tattoo parlour. They sterilized the hole and put piercing in.
Great story OP. Got to admire a woman that will suffer through massive blood loss before ruining a good day of fishing. Well done :)
ReplyDeleteThat's an awesome date! Just cause bad things happen doesn't make it a bad date.
ReplyDeleteThanks, all. I suppose I was being stubborn, but more out dripping wet abject embarrassment and not wanting to come off as whiny. I tried to be a good sport about the whole thing, and so did he. Not a bad foundation for a relationship, actually. -- OP
ReplyDeleteYawn.
ReplyDeleteJonathan, I was responding to Anonymous 9:59. Despite the fact that no one got almost-raped, the guy wasn't an asshole, the girl wasn't stuck-up, and no vegetarians were harmed in the making of this date, it was still a bad date. A bad date with a happy ending, but nonetheless.
ReplyDeleteI agree with your frustrations about the people on this site being too quick to say "This wasn't a bad date!" just because it wasn't some God-awful, horrible event. There are many differing degrees of "bad," and this certainly falls in the spectrum.
I'll say, Nikki. It was one of the most tedious stories I've read on this site; certainly qualifies as "bad".
ReplyDeleteSounds like you dodged a bullet there Wendell, this chuck sounds nuts.. wait what?
ReplyDeleteAnother nice read!
ReplyDeleteLOL, loved the little bit by Seven-Thirty as well.
My mother and father have been together around 30 years. On their first date, my dad almost choked to death on a piece of cake/pastry that my mom fed him (he's extremely allergic to walnuts)... And refused to acknowledge anything was wrong.
ReplyDeleteSo yeah. Bad date, good relationship... Can't always go by first impressions. Though I get where 4:33 is coming from...