Domo Aregato, Mr. Loser

Submitted by Melissa:

Fred was an excitable, curly-haired guy from the Internet who asked me out on a date to a Japanese place.  Nothing seemed to bring Fred down.  We traded stories about past relationships.  Mine seemed particularly ugly when compared to his, and he seemed to have had comparatively fewer romantic partners, but no big deal.  Maybe he was just picky.

When he picked me up, we gave each other a hug and he passed me a white box.  Inside was a blue kimono.

Unexpected and extremely generous, I thought.  "Thank you..." I said, truly touched.

He said, "It's not for you to keep.  It's to wear out tonight.  To dinner."

I told him, "I... hmm... I'm not sure if I should wear a kimono out to a Japanese place in a strip mall..."

"Of course you should," he said, very sure of himself.

I replied, "I've been to this place before.  They don't really stand on ceremony, and I wouldn't want them to be insulted... I don't know..."

He said, "What's the big problem?  I want you to wear it.  You won't do this for me?"

Something in his tone said, "Danger!  Danger!  Red alert!" and I carefully folded the kimono back into the box.

Choosing my next words carefully, I asked, "Maybe we could do something else?  I'm just not too comfortable with this idea."

He grabbed the box away, muttered, "Should've known," and took off, just like that.


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Missed out.  You could have looked like this.