The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

Submitted by Thomas:

About a year ago, I found Barbara online.  She was a med student who didn't seem to have the time for a relationship, much less even a single date.  We finally picked a Saturday in February.

During the week that was the lead up to the date, I thought it was weird when once or twice each e-mail or phone conversation, she'd say things like, "I can't wait to see what you're going to do.  You strike me as the romantic type," etc.

I wasn't sure what that was about until I realized that that particular Saturday was Valentine's Day.  Crap.  Our first date.  Valentine's Day.  How much is too much?  I mean, I didn't think that showing up empty-handed would be appropriate.  Then again, there is such a thing as too much.  Flowers?  Chocolates?  Tickets to a show?  An expensive dinner?

It was our first date, and we had been planning it for a while.  I wanted to play it safe, but I also wanted to express how I felt about her.  My plan was to buy a nice bouquet and take her out to a good meal.  Not a $75-per-plate, five-star affair, but a nice, quiet, romantic place.  I called the restaurant ahead of time, and they even said that they would have a live violinist to serenade the dining couples.

I showed up to her house with the flowers on the evening of Valentine's.  She took one look at them and her face noticeably dropped.  "Oh... thanks," was all she said before taking them from me and putting them on her kitchen table.

I suggested, "Shouldn't you put them in water?"

She retorted, "There are so few of them, I'm sure they'll be all right."

Ouch.  For your information, readers, there were certainly not "a few" of them.  This was a sizable bunch.

When we showed up to the restaurant, she wrinkled her face and asked, "This place?"

I asked her what was wrong with the restaurant – I had to book a reservation some time in advance.

She said, "Nothing wrong with it... I was just expecting... I don't know.  If it works for you then I guess it's okay with me.  Let's go."

I suggested going somewhere else, but she was already on her way out of the car.  She said, "You obviously think that this is a good enough place, so come on.  Let's get this done."

Whoa.  Not at all what I was expecting.  I also jumped out of the car and I asked her what the problem was.  Was it not good enough?

Her reply?  "Apparently, you don't think that I'm good enough."

"That's not fair!  I bought you flowers–"

"A few."

"It was a bouquet!  And I'm taking you out to a nice restaurant–"

She snorted and said, "Come on.  Don't ruin this.  Let's just go in and try to forget all about it."

"And be made to feel inadequate all night?  I think I'd rather take you home."

She stared at me and said, "It's Valentine's Day."

I said, "So you have flowers, and until a minute ago, you had a guy willing to take you out for a nice meal.  That's more than a lot of people have."

I dropped her off at home and aside from the obligatory, "You're an asshole" and "Happy Valentine's Day, asshole" texts, I didn't hear from her again.

I heated up some leftovers at home, and they tasted great.