Everybody Out of the Pool

Submitted by Carla:

The worst date of my life was also the shortest.  I showed up to the pool hall where I was going to meet Steve.  In the parking lot, I passed a huge pickup truck that looked like it was painted over with orange house paint and had a giant Confederate flag emblazoned on the back.

"I bet that's Steve's," I joked to myself, not being serious.

Once I was inside the hall, Steve's second question to me (after, "Why'd you dress like a teacher?") was, "Did you see my truck?"

His third question involved a bag of a white powdery substance.

"No thanks," I told him, "It's all yours."

He shook his head and said, "I've already had two lines.  I see God after three."

He winked and picked up a pool cue.  We played some pool, then out of nowhere, he told me to "Check it out," and broke his cue in half over his knee.

I was uncomfortable and thoroughly done with this date.  I sat him down, told him that I didn't think we were a good match, he said, "Yeah, you'll be right back," and I left.

I wouldn't be surprised if he's still waiting for me.  Or dead.