12/09/2009

Gym Rat

Submitted by Claudia:

Eric asked me out after months of flirting at the gym. I was so excited and couldn't wait for our date.

He took me out to an Italian restauant where we talked about him the entire time. I began volunteering information about myself, but he never seemed curious or asked me a follow-up question. Was he just being nervous?

He excused himself to go to the bathroom when a girl in a black coat and sunglasses walked by and slipped a note onto the table. It read, "Get out of here. He's going to rape you."

I looked around, suddenly afraid — who was that woman? How long had she been watching?

When he came back, I asked him if he knew the handwriting. He shuddered and said that it was his ex-girlfriend's. He paid the check and we left.

Once we were outside, the girl in the black coat and sunglasses came up to us. She grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards a wall, but I broke away and slapped her.

I heard Eric saying, "Jenny! What are you doing?"

She turned to him and buried herself in his chest, then whispered something I couldn't hear. Eric looked up at me and asked, "Can you give us a couple of minutes? Jenny and I need to talk."

I intended to take a walk around the block. A couple of minutes turned out to be 20 minutes, and I gave up on Eric and the whole affair.

He called me an hour later to apologize and ask where I was. I told him that I thought the whole date was a catastrophe from start to finish, and good luck with life. I never saw him at the gym again after that.

12 comments:

  1. Woah. That's one fucked up date right there.

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  2. Why did you show him the note? Did you need a confirmation?

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  3. maybe the ex gf was the one trying to rape you.

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  4. lol @ anon 9:12

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  5. Jesus. H. Christ. What a scary effin' date.

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  6. nutter ex-gf's (well, ex-bf's too for that matter) are never fun...

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  7. when reading, at first i thought the note was from somebody at the restaurant who saw the dude slip something in your drink or something. thats what my first reaction would be, and wouldnt show him the note.

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  8. i'm throwing the bs flag. not a word of it is true.

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  9. I agree, great pulp fiction at best.

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  10. You guys should make a movie in the gym together called "CUM spot me"

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  11. "Bitch Press"

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  12. "Lifting Heavy Loads"

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