Demonic Possession

Submitted by Jeff:

Jean and I met at college and ran a long distance relationship when we went back home for the summer.  We stayed in touch each day and things were just fine for a little while.

One day I told her that I was going out for lunch with a friend of mine.  Jean asked, "Is it a girl?"

I told her that it was, and Jean said, "I don't want you going."

I told Jean that this was just a friend of mine from high school who I was just seeing to catch up with.  Jean started getting angry and said, "I'm your girlfriend and I don't want you going out with her!  What's the issue?"

Jean screamed my ear off for a good hour or so (too long, I know.  I run things different today) and she wouldn't listen to reason.  I'd say, "In the amount of time you've been yelling at me, I could have gone and come back."

She'd say, "So just don't go!"

Ultimately, I did go, and Jean called and called the entire time, until I shut my phone off.

Finally, when I made it back home, I turned my phone on and less than a minute later, Jean called!  I picked it up.

She asked, "Where the hell were you?"

I told her, "I was out with my friend."

"After I expressly told you not to go?  Who do you think you are?"

I paused for just a moment and realized that if I had to listen to her whiny, stupid voice for one more second, that I'd likely have to kill myself.

I replied, "A happy, single guy," and hung up on her.  She called and called for the next couple of days, but finally stopped and I haven't heard from her since.